Sorry to interrupt my self-involved wailings about once upon a time, but Milt has posted a very informative and hysterically funny piece on the replacement testicles available for pets - various sizes for dogs, huge ones for bulls and apparently several different compositions depending on how real you want them to feel. Sorry, how real you imagine your animal would want them to feel. Or something.
I swiped this image from Milt's post because he ends by commenting on dog condoms. The ultimate treat for overindulged pets I guess - now man's best friend can keep his nads AND have his oats, but only if you are there to position the little raincoat.
The thing that got me is the small print - these damn canine condoms come meat scented!
Is doggy position not good enough? Are pampered pooches now to hope that their amour may want to turn round? Or are the manufacturers trying to do themselves out of business through, ahem, loss of members?