The Words to Northern Birds

(Scroll down a bit for the very rude lyrics, which carry a warning about EXPLICIT CONTENT, ergo, so does this post. If you don't like naughty words, don't go there.)


A while ago I wrote about a couple of Doctors calling themselves Amateur Transplants who are raising money for Macmillan Cancer Relief with their comedy album Fitness To Practice.

For some unfathomable reason this blog is turning up on one of the search engines, for the lyrics to two of the songs, particularly Northern Birds - however the link leads to my front page and not the post itself. Odd, huh?

As I've had about ten different people looking (mostly from the North!), here are the words.

Don't forget to check out the Amateur Transplant site and buy the bloody CD - its only six quid and its for a good cause!


Northern Birds (to the tune of More Than Words)

If you go to Bolton
If you go to Manchester or Crewe
Newcastle or Scarborough
York or Scunthorpe, Bradford, Barnsley too
Or Grimsby, listen up to what we have to say:

Northern Birds are lazy ugly whores
who smell of burgers
So don't have too much to drink
Or you might fuck one
And end up getting AIDS

Theres nothing fun to be found up the M1
Northen birds are lower class, slags who take it up the arse
They're in the sack after one cider and black
But they're fucking awful rides and your dick won't touch the sides

(break)

Northern birds.....

If you really have to
Go up North, then follow our advice
Fight away the women
Or you'll find yourself with pubic lice
And herpes, you're much better staying in the South

Northern birds are desperate ugly hippos dressed in Burberry
With a peanut for a brain
And an accent
That makes you want to die

Now you've been warned
They're all physically deformed
Northern birds are all obese
And they're riddled with disease

Try to escape, Northern sex is worse than r*pe
Stay down South and mark my words
Stay well clear of Northern birds

(break)

Northern birds.....

Northern birds.....

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