Grumble

A simple question to all you mums out there.

Say you arranged a night out, arranged a babysitter (a free one, family;) waved your kid off for the night and went to get dressed.

Say you then got news that the invitation was off, that you had nowhere to go after all.

Rotten huh? Really miserable, especially if you're a single mum on a limited budget who doesn't get out much.

The question is - what do you do next? Do you:

• phone your sitters, tell them its all off and offer to come and get your kid,
  
• do you stay quiet, find something else to do, but make sure you are up and ready to collect your child in the morning as agreed, or
• do you allow your ex to come round, spend the night knocking back snakebite at his expense (lager, cider & blackcurrant), and crawl out of bed with him, furry tongued and dry brained and useless, at one o'clock the following afternoon, slur to your babysitter (whose fifth phonecall was the noise that woke you) , and make it perfectly obvious you are unfit to collect your child for another 24 hours?

If you picked the third option, then congratulations, maybe you should hook up with my 22 year old Daughter; then you could have company on the road to regret. Probably, like her, you can't see where regret comes into this little scenario, but it will; by the time your kid hits sweet sixteen for starters, if not before. There is no asnwer to 'Well, you did it too, mum.'

I had to phone her again today (because we are an hour or so behind the second pick up time) and she still doesn't have a plan, except the one we agreed on yesterday has of course changed again. I was terse with her on the phone and the stupid moo thinks its because she's got that fella in tow. She can't see how she wailed about being unfairly treated and messed around at the last minute by the girl she originally planned to go out with, then went right on and did exactly the same to us.

My kids are happy - they've had company and I've hardly said a word to them all weekend - they've been off playing. Like I say, they're happy. Me? Not so much.

The funny thing is I suspect there were too many coincidences in all this. I actually suspect her of lying to me, right off the bat, so she could have this make-or-break piss-up with the local smiling, drunken wide boy.

This is my baby, my first born, the one with all the potential. The one who has been getting used to gutter life ever since that first little shit got her pregnant and moved her in to a basement flat to play happy families until he spent all the money on himself, ran up debts all over the shop, and ran back home to mummy. She was a good girl then. She never laid blame outside, never even let us know, until he left her picking up the pieces and she just couldn't cope.

Phil - a lot of this is YOUR fault. You taught her to lie and you taught her to take shit and get on with it. On the other hand, you're nearer to 30 than 20, and still living at home with mummy. Sucking life out of your parents so you can have everything 'just so' in your own affairs. I guess if I had to pity anyone in all this, it would be the girl you are planning to marry. Does she have any real clue what she's letting herself in for? Or are you a good match? Will you both just go on leeching off your parents like overgrown toddlers? Yuck.