18 December 2005

Joy To The World

Joy to the World, for grandad's drunk
And thinks that he can sing.
My patience has been tested, he's going to be arrested
For waggling his thing,
For waggling his thing,
For flashing the neighbours, and waggling his thing.

Joy to the earth, the roast is burnt,
We gave it to the cat,
Who may be on a winner, but we've no sodding dinner
And that's the end of that,
And that's the end of that,
Its scorched beyond all buggery, and that's the end of that.

No more shall I be doing this,
I simply can't be arsed.
The kids are really crying, they're wailing like they're dying;
They could be, pretty fast,
They could be pretty fast,
Don't push it, I've had enough, you could be, pretty fast.

God, did I drink so bloody much?
I'm feeling rather queer,
But thank you baby Jesus, we didn't fuck the cheeses,
Its only once a year,
Its only once a year,
So smile and remember this, its only once a year.

In honour of Ella M's anti-Carols.


JF said...

nice person saying hi. like the rhyme. maybe I could get them to sing that in choir!! haha.

zilla said...

"...baby Jesus ... cheeses" = priceless :-)

Tom said...

I like it!

Michael Manning said...

A Songwriter is born. Let's get Spinal Tap to play it!!!

Kim said...

lol, oh my... why is it i can just hear my kids signing that in the car on the way to Gradma's house?

fineartist said...

Heeeeeeeeeeee, It just wouldn't be Christmas without carols.

Rain said...

oh that a funny one!

ella m. said...

That's a good one....I'm adding it to my caroling this year :D

Badaunt said...

Now, if only someone would release this version, they'd probably play it in Japanese stores because they don't understand the words anyway. And I would ENJOY it!

(If I have to hear Wham singing "Last Christmas" one more time I'm going to kill somebody.)