20 February 2006

1950s Eyebrows

I have 1950s eyebrows.

So that seems like a vacuous, vain and self involved statement to make. Fair go. My eyebrows in their natural state would look at home on any horsey-faced 1950s brunette, from Joyce Grenfell to Joan Crawford. Its just the way they are, planted high above my eyes, they go straight out until they go straight down, like a pair of shelf brackets, (without the depth of course, I mean I'm not Dennis Healy).

What brought this on?

Tabby Rabbit was blogging about the bits of a movie she liked, which turned out to be the boots in this scene, the suit worn in that, and it reminded me of the last time I watched a movie three or four times not for enjoyment of the story but for more technical reasons. This was way back in the very early seventies when the BBC's stock of Sunday afternoon family movies was limited and mostly from the 1930s to 50s. Things like Show Boat.

Back when 'modern' beauty involved short eyebrows near to the eyes with no visible socket (Susan George, Suzi Quatro, in some shots Twiggy), when being grown up meant wearing all the things I wasn't allowed, like a ton of liquid eyeliner and false lashes, Show Boat was my first make-up lesson. A limited palette of subtle pastels (which was all I was allowed) mixed to define my sort of high brow bone and eyes that were simultaneously deep set and prominent. Watching Helen Morgan and the rest taught me how to colour in all the way from lashes to brow without looking like a clown.

Since then (even though I am stuck in a happy rut now, rarely wear makeup and don't feel the need for hints and tips any more) if a woman appears pretty on a music video, advert or movie, I always end up analysing how her face has been done.

White or cream inner eyeliner, a false glow to the skin at the inner or outer eye, how many shades of eyeshadow (usually in plum and neutral and beiges and browns if others (men) are trying to say she looks natural) two or three different shades of lippy.

All those face cream and cleanser adverts really annoy me - the ones where the girl appears to rub the moisturiser or whatever into a cheek that is wearing three shades of foundation and two or three of blusher, I mean PLEASE! How thick do they think we are? I can have skin like yours, dear? Not from that bloody cleansing cream I can't; lets have the half dozen tubes of pigment, the highlighter, the lipgloss and the trained makeup artist you just used, plus the soft lighting and the complimentary background. Grrrr.

The bottom line these days, I guess, when someone looks glowing and attractive, is that it makes me feel a hell of a lot better to sit there smugly, knowing they're wearing a ton weight of slap to create the illusion. That in the end its all bullsh*t, all smoke and mirrors and underneath it all they're 99% of them girls you wouldn't notice in the supermarket. Thank Heaven.

14 comments:

She Weevil said...

Having two sisters, one nice and one obviously huffy, we used to spend hours doing makeup. We weren't supposed to wear it out of the house. I didn't, being the eldest, responsible repressed one. I remember walking home from school one day meeting my youngest sister (four years my junior) with a full face of slap, telling her she looked like a tart.
That was maybe a bit strong but proto-aunt sally would have been quite close to the mark.
Oh. what fun we had.
I have the eyebrows too. Can't understand why people are quite so eager to do away with theirs. Think mine are about my best feature.

Cheryl said...

I never had any sisters - two brothers both younger and, well, horrible, at the time.

bart said...

just be proud of your eyebrows, whatever happens :D ...

after years of having felt "odd" and discriminated i suddenly felt totally validated after having found monobrow.com

keep well...

lydia said...

In respect to those annoying ads: lots of make up but don't forget all the air brushing and digital enhancement!
i think the most annoying ad i saw was for immac strips, the girls pulled off the strip saying "ooh that didn't hurt a bit". yeah, thats because there is clearly no hair on your leg!
so annoying.
came via blog explosion wanted to say hello too.

She Weevil said...

Hi Lydia - In the dim and distant apst when I thought Immac strips might be just the ticket the packet I bought ended up being used to take fluff off my uniform.

It might be twenty years ago but unless theyv'e put dynamite in their glue they're not getting my leg hairs without a fight.

Killired said...

good evening! i'm visiting from michele's comment cheer game!

Goodbye Mes Amis said...

The best is when they are trying to sell a face product (cream or makeup) and the person's skin is so blown out from all the lights they have on her to look wrinkle free, that you can't even see her skin (it happens to Sarah Jessica Parker and Andie McDowell (sp?) a lot).
Re: Eyebrows - don't you work with what you've got? Try to be most flattering to your face/eyes whatever? I remember a rich girlfriend of mine from an uppity school telling me that it only appeared that girls from her neighbourood were good looking because they simply knew how to dress for their bodies. They were skillfully taught by their mothers how to do the best with what they had. Um... did anyone have a mother like that? I didn't.
Anywhoo... I visited from Michele's.

fineartist said...

Susan George, I loved her in To Sir With Love...I need to watch that again, I think I need some inspiration...

Make-up shmakeup, I had no idea you guys called it slap, but I like it. The name, the stuff is a pain in the arse and I use as little of it as I can get by with, and still look alive. heh heh.

Once I took my little girl to the store, she was around three, when I looked down at her as we walked into the place, you know to check if she had dirt on her face or something, I noticed in horror that she had lipstick scrawled all over her little face, and some on her lips too. Good gaaaa, I thought, when was the last time you looked at this kid? Brother....and no a spit bath would not get that face clean, she just smiled so proud, and asked me, Do I look pretty momma? Yes, honey.

Cheryl said...

Bart I am SO SORRY!
I just, finally, looked at that link.
ROFL!
I must admit I got sidetracked (from week 52?) to the party wig shop.

Tabby Rabbit said...

So true about the skin ads. Saying that, you can't beat a bit of slap (I loved the no 7 tagline "It's not make up, it's ammunition"). Yet I am still am unable to use liquid liner / blusher / more than one shade of eyeshadow at a time (I like to blame my parents for not buying me a Girls' World, rather than myself).

Have you ever had your eyebrows 'threaded'? Was meant to go and have it done last week and chickened it (to go and watch horror films / admire Julie Christie's boots instead)

Ally said...

I only have one eyebrow; I became reconciled to it years ago and gave up trying to pluck a gap in the middle to make it in to two when I was about nineteen.

Best Eyebrows In A Movie Ever Award: Bette Davis in 'Now Voyager'.

Cheryl said...

Am writing this quickly so I can go and google pictures of threaded eyebrows and Now Voyager.

Ally - I was a hairy baby - so apparently was Elizabeth Taylor. My mother decided it was a sign of great beauty and stuck to that excuse, bless her.
I get a few faint stragglers trying to cross the great divide between brows, but my worst problem is caused by the the strays that make it all the way to my eyelids - not quite downy and not quite wire, they HURT to get shot of because the skin is so soft and they lie so flat.
Try Wax Away - an adorable little toy tin saucepan you warm on the hob, then paint on, let dry and rip!

Warning from experience - dont let even a sugar strand of it get to your eyelashes, or vaseline them first.... rofl!

Anonymous said...

really annoy me - the ones where the girl appears to rub the moisturiser or whatever into a cheek that is wearing three shades of foundation and two or three of blusher

Er... SNAP
Actually - all adverts annoy me.

Z said...

Not ANON (see above)