I'm sitting here tonight, as this little end of the country cools down, and I'm watching the enormous, vital streaks of summer lightning setting the night sky ablaze.
Its a huge storm, about 12 miles out to sea and each explosion of power is dancing across the heavens, painting a giant, beautiful lattice of blue-white light that sears the rest of the night sky into a brief scream of violet, before earthing from multiple points.
They are coming at a rate of roughly one every twenty seconds, these forks and streaks and prongs and sheets, this lace work and metal work, this joy.
So I'm sitting watching that and thinking I must blog about it, and it brings to mind all the other things that have happened in the past two months, all those never-to-be-repeated thoughts, moments, sights, ideals, decisions, wrongs, slips, affections.
Its not that they werent moving, I mean if I was a car you could say they definitely turned my ignition. I am not become zombie.
I just have to work out now (still playing car) if its my sparks, tappits or the battery that needs sorting out, because hey I feel that urge to share with you all - to write, to create, or to answer and support (because I still read yout posts on your own blogs), its just that before I can get to the keyboard the impetus is gone, petered out.
My best intentions are so, so leaky; all the oomph trickles out before they generate action. the ideas are sound, its the excecution that fails me.
I feel so stupid.
People I used to love to talk to now do my head in, because they are at 'my speed' and I am not, they bounce and sparkle and I can't keep up. They might as well be Gerald McBoing Boing and I might as well have a bad hangover.
But they're not hyper at all. They're the ones at normal speed.
So me and my psyche, we're just going to toddle back indoors, find our mental slippers, maybe play a few games of solitaire (or maybe not as that sounds too much like thinking), do our best impression of grumpy old men recuperating as slowly as possible and,... and well we'll come back out when we damn well fancy the idea, or theres something nice for tea, bacause thats the way it goes with old grumps, you just never can tell.
Off to bed now to lie in the dark and really experience this storm. I just hope it brings rain because dry lightning is scary and way less predictable.