01 June 2006

About Thursday Thirteens

My Thursday Thirteen list for today is one post down.

I both love and hate Thursday Thirteen - love it for the concept and some of the lists you find, hate it because I can never think of a fun or interesting list, and (ahem) for some of the lists you find.

We're all different.

Some people love movie quotes. Some love listing favourite tracks.

Sometimes I've heard of the movies or the songs, but its rare to work out if I saw/heard them.

If I've got something to say, I say it, at length, as those who take my regular everyday comments can testify. But what do you do if you go to a blog, read a list that you just can't relate to (or worse, disagree with completely), yet want to support the person, let then know you were there and appreciate the effort; just that you can't relate enough to come out with a whole sentence?

I used, on occasions to say 'Nice list :-)'

No more.

Apparently this is the fall back, copy and paste style remark of those who don't want to read at all, just oblige you into a return visit. This has been mentioned at Leanne's main site and so that option is closed.

I'm stuck now. Sometimes, when you get to around point 7 in an involved list, you get the urge to suggest to this person that, for example, if they watched their children these things wouldn't happen, or that they should get off their self pitying butt and they don't deserve the blessings they do have as others would have made better use of them (actually my paltry effort below counts as a case in point, there).

What do you do when you want to effectively smile and wave without being either rude or dishonest?

Nothing now.

I am so, so crap at thinking up these lists. It feels like there are three choices; dissect your failings, applaud yourself, or play teacher and make a list like you are trying to educate others. Yuck. As there are few plans in my future that I care to share (kiss of death, telling people about them, in my case), I end up scouring deeper and deeper to find something wrong in my life. Not productive.

The teaching style lists really get to me, some people are so earnest and genuine about their revelations, yet they phrase some pretty basic ideas as instruction instead of sharing and if I'm in evil granny mode I fight the urge to answer along the lines of 'And.....??'

Its a shame because there are some wonderful, witty, interesting people on the TT list, but it takes too much spiritual energy to dig through and find them.

No more ploughing down the list of participants, for me, I'm going to simply answer those that comment here, always provided I think of a list in the first place.

Still, on the up side, I avoided joining the permanent blogroll on TT, although I've played this game (badly) for a few weeks now. I guess that means I hear my intuition more often than I'd imagined.

20 comments:

Norma said...

You could have numbered your paragraphs or points. I'd say you're really good at this.

Cheryl said...

This isnt my list!

I've been to see you already - you are one of the diamonds in the coaldust :-)

Tricia said...

But this could have been your list. :)

I understand how you feel. I come across the occasional list that I just have nothing to say to. usually in those cases I do make a comment but say very little - ie nice list. I'm trying to acknowledge that I've been to the persons site and did indeed read their list but sometimes their list just doesn't do anything for me.

I guess that now it's better not to even leave a comment in those cases?

ladydaria said...

I am a lot like this. Somedays I have a lot to say and other days nothing comes. I hate boring lists and I have been guilty of having a dew myself. I think we all have, lol. Happy TT and thanks for visiting mine.

Dariana
http://daridonovan.net/blog/

Natsthename said...

I'd have to agree with you on most points. I try to write something fun that most can relate to and that I would enjoy reading in another's blog post, and when I comment, I strive to pick at least one point to play up. I think I owe at least that much!

Billy said...

I've noticed that you sometimes refer to a 'meme'. Is this French for 'same', as in 'la meme chose', or simply an abbreviation for' me, me, me!'?

Yours always baffled,

Billy.

Wendy Boucher said...

Nice post. (Hah, that's supposed to sound like "nice list.")

I agree with you. For me, TT is fun to write but not always fun to read. My TT's are always nonsense and make me laugh (if nobody else). Many others take a more personal approach. I have been amazed and moved but occasionally bored to tears. But since I never know which way it will go, I read as many as I can week after week. I'm simply not going to be able to read them all.

Since I'm a writer, I usually respond with a whole sentence.

Cheryl said...

Natalie - tactful! I should take notes :)

Wendy - thanks

Billy: pronounced meem, shortening of mimeme from the greek mimema, somethig imitated. It measn a unit of cultural information transmitted by repetition.

It still boils down to 'all about me, me, me' when applied to the memes that do the rounds on blogs, say one person will list their ten favourite foods (!) and ask others to do the same.

Was that a genuine question?

Lisa Alexander said...

I'm sorry to interrupt, but I just want to say "kudos" to Cheryl! This is from NuIBO to MillySoo! Cheryl is a wonderful person and who should be listened to carefully! Great Job Cheryl!

Billy said...

Thank you, Cheryl. Yes, it was a genuine question.

Here's another: why on earth would anyone ask somebody to list their ten favourite foods? Where's the sense in that? Is it a woman thing? Or perhaps a symptom of some terrible and fundamental societal malaise?

You know, I sometimes get the feeling when reading the comments section of your pages (can't bring myself to use the 'b' word), that I have stumbled upon some kind of cyber-coven. It's a bit frightening, actually!

But I keep coming back.

Your pal,

Billy.

Cheryl said...

Lisa - I can pick holes in things but you can build stuff. Kudos right back.

Billy - More to it than gender.
Self confidence, impetus, character, all sorts (ok most of the all sorts come under impetus).
This calls for a blog post I suspect.

zilla said...

Slightly off topic, the best list I ever stumbled on was about a year after my father died. I put on his old flannel jacket and found a small slip of paper in the pocket. Printed in my father's hand:

GROCERIES

vodka
gin
scotch
vermouth
tonic water
tomato juice
o.j.
bitters
maraschino cherries
lemons
limes
olives
cashews


(I won't play TT until I can top that.)

zilla said...

PS I needed to be the 13th commenter. Couldn't resist.

Cheryl said...

Of course Zilla
Us being witches, that would be the lucky number, yes?
;-)

the_yecart said...

Good post...I agree. What I did when I started 13-ing, was to go through the blogroll, and bookmark a bunch of them that I enjoyed reading. That way, I could read and enjoy them any day, and not just on thurs.

I do it because I like the challenge of thinking up 13 things. And if I don't have a "good to me" list, I wouldn't post it. What is leanne going to do? Kick me off the blogroll?

Girl, you rock, and you can come by anytime and tell me Nice post. (It's like saying Nice A$$, I'd accept a compliment no matter what! :-)

The Lady Muck said...

Blog performance pressure. Blame it on that.

Blog anxiety's the worst, especially when it comes to comments.

However, the post seems to work as a list! Happy accidents eh?

Try not to overthink it though :D

Stegbeetle said...

Cyber-coven! Love it! So Cheryl, do you see yourself as wicked witch or a good witch?

Lifecruiser said...

Well, I frankly don't care! Ooops. That could be misinterpreted if you want to misinterpret it. Geeez. What I mean is: It's all about having fun, have a nice time. No one should take it so serious. It's called socializing.... *lol*

I think this post AND your list is great. It's what YOU want to say on YOUR blog and we all have to accept that. As I accept comments like "Nice list"... That tells me something too - either you couldn't relate to the post I wrote or your just hunting for links to your own blog, but whatever it is I don't care. We have blog freedom. In my mind anyway.

We're all different and should be accepted for the one we are. Like in real life.

I find it interesting :-)

TLC said...

If I run across a list that leaves me cold, I honestly don't make a comment. Better to be honest than disingenuous pretending to like it.

I have done that a time or two. Political lists (especially conservative lists) I steer completely clear of due to it not being good for my blood pressure.

chosha said...

What's the difference between reading a list and not leaving a comment and never seeing the list at all? I understand that thing of wanting to support them, but if you really have no connection at all with what they've written, I think it's fine to just click 'back' and go elsewhere. You stumbled on my TT by looking around, and that's how I found yours. Now you're on my list for bloglines. I think the good blogs are worth a little random searching, even if you don't want to go through the whole list.