04 February 2010

Waiting for the Nurse to phone

Today I am typing this whilst wearing a neck brace. Its a large, moulded sponge NHS brace with an intrinsic cover made of stockinette and a velcro fastening at the back. Not a natural fibre in sight. I looked them up online - its a 'budget' brace and the manufacturer sells them at £3.50 per unit.

Earlier today I was also wearing moisturised tissues, tucked in around the brace, to try and stop it from rubbing my chin any more raw.

They weren't working. The copious applications of antiseptic cream I applied last night weren't working either - in fact they made it sting even more. Just now (and I am SO glad he never bothers to read this) I am sat here with my husbands best yellow silk tie, the one with the tiny polka dots, tied around my head to soothe the welt, just so I can keep looking down at the keyboard. Now THAT's working. I just double knotted a beautiful item made of dry-clean-only, heavy duty, pure silk. Top quality accessory, that.

I don't care.

Friction or allergy - I really have no idea. I simply have a very very VERY red chin, but hey, what's another indignity in the grand scheme of things? This is why I'm waiting for the nurse to phone; to see whether there's a better version of the brace for allergy sufferers (the NHS do that a lot - issue the cheapest tat first, just in case its good enough) or whether, because I can slide my chin inside the collar if I want to, I need to go down a size. There are only three sizes. I know that from the website. Maybe the next one down would cut the blood off altogether. Hmm, choices, choices.

Something, anything, even an unofficial, under-the-table DIY natural-fibre padding trick that doesn't involve wrapping ties round ones head, would be so gratefully received.

I WAS looking like one of those hamster cheeked grannies that one might except to be occupying  a wipe-clean fireside chair, wearing a floral frock and her tights around her ankles. Now its gone beyond Pythonesque. Is looking ridiculous preferable to looking decrepit? Defiinitely.

I guess that's the price you pay.

1 comment:

fineartist said...

You poor baby, I feel your pain. Cold sores, I'll trade you that neck brace for these oozing, itching, burning lesions/leper sores I have festering on my lip, and, oww, in my NOOOOOSE. I'm whining. And I'm going for the mentholatum, oh that might help you it's good for chaffing.

Hugs and kisses, but not with these lips, they're infected, but maybe with Johnny Depp's lips.