Rampant Rumblings

We should have got shot of our two baby guinea pigs at 6 to 8 weeks old, before Christmas. Having fought through the tears and pleading of our youngest daughter, we finally had the family prepared for their departure. A quick call to the pet shop that had sworn to take them, however, established that the take up on baby caveys had slowed, and their cages were full already. They also took the opportunity to mention that they would prefer females, females can share a cage quite happily whilst two males will rip chunks out of each other. Same as usual, then. At that point in time we couldnt tell which was what.

Now our little eating & pooping machines are 12 weeks old and still here, and we have just discovered that they are a pigeon pair, one male and one female.
This is disaster. None of them can go in with big daddy, he has gone so long without his oats that he doesnt seem fussed by gender. His son, however, is in full teenage hormone rush and its hysterical to watch.

This is what a courting/rutting male guinea pig does:

1. Starts to rumble like a washing machine on its last legs, complete with a deep purring noise and the visible shakes.
2. Then straightens his back legs and starts a John Wayne swagger, on the spot. "Hey, look ladies, I'm so big down there I can't walk straight!" (Rumble and shudder continue throughout.)
   
3. Continues in this vein until he thinks he's made his point, then makes a sudden, desperate mad dash at the nearest female backside, causing much squealing and chasing round in circles a la Benny Hill.

Its sad, but we have to choose fast between the pet shop and the vets. Hic Sob.