Blog Explosion have a brilliant competition on this month - I quote:
Tired of your current Blog design?
For the month of February Blog Explosion will be awarding 3 lucky members with a free blog re-design !!
Me me me me me!!! Make it be me!
My friend and sister chocoholic Shelly started blogging about the same time as me, but got hooked, zoomed off on a massive learning curve (that left me standing, dumfounded, feeling decidedly thick) and now has SEVEN brilliant blogs on the go, all with fantastic graphics (or if you're American - Awesome). Heres the link to the chocolate one, but go by her profile and have a nose at the lot - I mean wow.
Coooeee! Blog Explosion! You are such NICE people! And my blog layout is so serious and basic! And I am so techno-dumb! Me me me me me - please?
Check out the girls they've asked to do the redesigns: Web Divas; talk about swish.
I would go green with envy, but the typeface would dissappear...............
09 February 2005
Rules Radar
Why is it that perfectly normal ordinary kids can learn to live (just about) within basic household rules such as don't tuck your toast down the gap in the sofa, dont hide smelly socks behind the curtain etc, yet when you have a week off sick or even just plain bleugh, when you wake up to the surroundings its like a sock and tissue bomb has gone off?
How do they know, the instant you fail to notice one misdemeanor, or correct one of your own, that they can treat the carpet like a bin bag without being murdered?
Or maybe - anti-housework as I am, just maybe I actually do some without noticing over the normal course of the day, but do I really pick up everything after everybody? Or just notice quickly enough to use the evil eye?
Whatever, coming round and taking my 'emergencies-only blinkers' off, there seems like more than a weeks worth of catch-up to do. Bugger, and yuk.
How do they know, the instant you fail to notice one misdemeanor, or correct one of your own, that they can treat the carpet like a bin bag without being murdered?
Or maybe - anti-housework as I am, just maybe I actually do some without noticing over the normal course of the day, but do I really pick up everything after everybody? Or just notice quickly enough to use the evil eye?
Whatever, coming round and taking my 'emergencies-only blinkers' off, there seems like more than a weeks worth of catch-up to do. Bugger, and yuk.
08 February 2005
Differences between Britain and America
We eat pancakes only once a year, as a luxury pig-out and as a precursor to 40 days of being good.
We might have lots of Jews and Irish here, but we don't know because we don't keep count. If you're here, you're here.
We might have lots of Jews and Irish here, but we don't know because we don't keep count. If you're here, you're here.
Bloody Adverts
Grrr. It seems that German and American companies have the worst adverts on UK TV. German because they must have sat there and thought 'Oh, it says that UK audiences respond to humour' and then had a terribly hard time remembering what humour was until they looked back at their pre-pubescence when some things seemed mildly amusing, and decided that was it. End result - adverts using grown humans, targeted at 12 year olds. Well, 12 yr olds who want to snack over the company computer on cold rice pudding - bleugh. Muller anything, I hate the adverts.
Werthers originals - they werent in the UK when our pensioners were kids, they are a German sweet. So what if that means the cherubic blonde haired blue eyed boy's grandad who sucked 'em when he was a lad was also in the SS or the Hitler youth at the time?
And Campino! OMG. These poor bloody actresses stuck in some shopping centre trying to make themselves sound brain dead and a solid lump of coloured and flavoured sugar sound orgasmic - Mmmmmm so crrreammmy! Eyelids a-fluttering, girls a-giggling. They did their best with a crud script and rubbish direction, but hey guys, if you were mid bonk and looked up to see your amour making faces like that - wouldnt you run off and join a monastery? Or at least invest in a strong paper bag. Always provided you survived the initial shock, of course.
American adverts get up my nose because the whole world knows that professional advertisers in the US are in complete denial - all their subjects are totally unrelated to real people and may as well live in the Trueman Show - 4 inches of pancake foundation cream and enough hairspray to make an individual hole in the ozone layer - and thats just the blokes.
The latest offering is that air freshener thing that sends up puffs of pong every so often.
OF COURSE the American and therefore English public are going to want to emulate squeaky clean, over made up, shiny, happy Janet & John families whose idea of exciting sharing is to lean precariously, ear to ear, over the bloody anti-pong thing, trying to see it puff. Not.
What really upsets me is that they never learn, The reason they never learn is because we do have citizens who are not so nauseated by this offensive dumbing down and the patronising crud-come-torture that they can actually buy the products without throwing up all over the checkout girl. For shame.
Werthers originals - they werent in the UK when our pensioners were kids, they are a German sweet. So what if that means the cherubic blonde haired blue eyed boy's grandad who sucked 'em when he was a lad was also in the SS or the Hitler youth at the time?
And Campino! OMG. These poor bloody actresses stuck in some shopping centre trying to make themselves sound brain dead and a solid lump of coloured and flavoured sugar sound orgasmic - Mmmmmm so crrreammmy! Eyelids a-fluttering, girls a-giggling. They did their best with a crud script and rubbish direction, but hey guys, if you were mid bonk and looked up to see your amour making faces like that - wouldnt you run off and join a monastery? Or at least invest in a strong paper bag. Always provided you survived the initial shock, of course.
American adverts get up my nose because the whole world knows that professional advertisers in the US are in complete denial - all their subjects are totally unrelated to real people and may as well live in the Trueman Show - 4 inches of pancake foundation cream and enough hairspray to make an individual hole in the ozone layer - and thats just the blokes.
The latest offering is that air freshener thing that sends up puffs of pong every so often.
OF COURSE the American and therefore English public are going to want to emulate squeaky clean, over made up, shiny, happy Janet & John families whose idea of exciting sharing is to lean precariously, ear to ear, over the bloody anti-pong thing, trying to see it puff. Not.
What really upsets me is that they never learn, The reason they never learn is because we do have citizens who are not so nauseated by this offensive dumbing down and the patronising crud-come-torture that they can actually buy the products without throwing up all over the checkout girl. For shame.
Grumble
Bought a book to read on the train yesterday - The Grumpy Old Men. LOVE em. Couldnt eat a whole one. Chuckling out loud at times, I realised one thing, I am a coward.
A coward at putting into print that which I hold to be true, for fear of offending someone else who, equally validly (if stupidly) holds other things true.
I started this blog to ramble madly and then tiptoed backwards into apologetics. Sad cow.
I think when I come back from my little trip this morning I shall begin with the age old supremely bleeping aggravating subject of TV adverts. Yeahhhhhhhhhhh............
A coward at putting into print that which I hold to be true, for fear of offending someone else who, equally validly (if stupidly) holds other things true.
I started this blog to ramble madly and then tiptoed backwards into apologetics. Sad cow.
I think when I come back from my little trip this morning I shall begin with the age old supremely bleeping aggravating subject of TV adverts. Yeahhhhhhhhhhh............
05 February 2005
HEEELP
Anyone surfing past this who can view the source and tell me which colour code relates to the horrible illegible grey that the links in my posts seem to be will earn my serious gratitude.
I've found the right red (for every khaki there is a 'right red') but spent ages previewing in the template page and managed to change the colour of just about everything but the links mid-post (see Telecom Plus / The Utility Warehouse, two posts down)
Purleeeeease pretty please? Anyone?
I've found the right red (for every khaki there is a 'right red') but spent ages previewing in the template page and managed to change the colour of just about everything but the links mid-post (see Telecom Plus / The Utility Warehouse, two posts down)
Purleeeeease pretty please? Anyone?
Don't know what to say.
Not in the mood to be informative, opinionated, funny, chatty, anything.
Been listening to training tapes for the new business and the guy has likened just about every scenario to formula one driving. I'm OK with that, honestly, but I am beginning to recognise an element of burn-out in myself, all revved up all week with no place to go........well places to go for sure, but next week. Hiccups and hold-ups, I havent found a pace yet and its annoying the hell out of me.
I just don't seem to have managed to fit a life in amongst the anticipation.
One thing I know about myself - this guy warns against getting too eager, working too hard (how honest and unlike any MLM is that??), says to keep a happy pace to avoid 'crashing your car'.
So now I have this revelation about me - I dont crash, I have no intention of stopping, its just that my engine overheats. Flip, I can see the steam from here. Both scenarios can make an engine explode so I guess I am going to have to make a concerted effort to leave the vehicle and let it cool, or wander off in search of water, which in itself is flipping aggravating - I'm only in this state because my 'car' hasnt got far enough up the road already for my liking. Bugger bugger bugger bum.
I didnt know when I signed on that I was going to be 'high maintenance'. One thing is for sure, when I have a stream of downlines in this set up I will have an answer for everything: pre-formatted, smiley, enthusiastic and informative little notes ready to personalize. I may never have been a salesman like my upline, but boy have I been a trainer, wet nursed the most aggressive, incompetent, self employed go-getters imaginable and turned them into something akin to professionals without either of us drawing blood. Motivation should be my middle name.
Wow I found something to feel good about.
So, apart from the facts that:
So Ner. I feel better now.
Not in the mood to be informative, opinionated, funny, chatty, anything.
Been listening to training tapes for the new business and the guy has likened just about every scenario to formula one driving. I'm OK with that, honestly, but I am beginning to recognise an element of burn-out in myself, all revved up all week with no place to go........well places to go for sure, but next week. Hiccups and hold-ups, I havent found a pace yet and its annoying the hell out of me.
I just don't seem to have managed to fit a life in amongst the anticipation.
One thing I know about myself - this guy warns against getting too eager, working too hard (how honest and unlike any MLM is that??), says to keep a happy pace to avoid 'crashing your car'.
So now I have this revelation about me - I dont crash, I have no intention of stopping, its just that my engine overheats. Flip, I can see the steam from here. Both scenarios can make an engine explode so I guess I am going to have to make a concerted effort to leave the vehicle and let it cool, or wander off in search of water, which in itself is flipping aggravating - I'm only in this state because my 'car' hasnt got far enough up the road already for my liking. Bugger bugger bugger bum.
I didnt know when I signed on that I was going to be 'high maintenance'. One thing is for sure, when I have a stream of downlines in this set up I will have an answer for everything: pre-formatted, smiley, enthusiastic and informative little notes ready to personalize. I may never have been a salesman like my upline, but boy have I been a trainer, wet nursed the most aggressive, incompetent, self employed go-getters imaginable and turned them into something akin to professionals without either of us drawing blood. Motivation should be my middle name.
Wow I found something to feel good about.
So, apart from the facts that:
- I broke a tooth last night and have a smile like something off Nightmare On Elm Street with perfect timing for the big day on Monday
- I put weight on recently and only have/had one pair of really smart trousers that fit comfortably and the cat has just scratched huge thread-loops into the front of one leg
- I have one pair of smart-ish flat shoes fit for a training day doing who knows what and they're suede and dirty.
- I ran out of my favourite hair conditioner, the local Superdrug stopped selling it and I look like you could stuff a horsehair sofa with the mop on my head
- The kids are cheerfully trying to wind each other up / kill each other as I sit and write (Imogen has just begun a war of attrition, repetitively whining a little song to get up Lewis' nose, and I can see his fists twitching from here)
So Ner. I feel better now.
02 February 2005
A quick catch up.
Got lots of lovely work for an equally nice lady. Of course its needed ASAP with no specific time limits set, so naturally school has had a teacher training day, one of my kids has been off sick last week and this and I am full of another streaming cold and am typing this with one eye closed, at arms length - wont say why arms length, use your imagination. Everything that could go wrong has done just that, I feel backlogged with work and guilty as heck and you know what? I still just cant stop smiling.
My Birthday, on Monday, was brilliant - the kids got me cashews and Belgian chocs and were so excited and pleased with themselves that I felt all loved and snuggly. Then The Beloved Other Half BOH took the day off work (therefore so did I, naturally) and we sloped around town, starting at the best coffee house ever and ending up in an out of the way pub for a huge plate of steak and chips before coming home in time to get the kids from school.
I joined Telecom Plus / The Utility Warehouse, not just as a customer (oooh yummy, LOADS less in bills) but as a distributor as well. I mean, why not? I HATE selling stuff to people but everyone has a phone and an electricity supply and most have gas, internet and a mobile as well, so this is like falling off a log, its just getting them what they already shell out for but CHEAP. Established, longstanding, quality, proper and cheap. Not a cowboy in sight and after some hard knocks and silly mistakes, believe me when I say I know how to spot one - these guys however are proper, respectable, on the level and I am happy as a pig in mud.
Happy happy happy happy happy - its like getting a magic wand so I can play fairy Godmother and whiz round making my friends better off without them having to do anything but sign a bit of paper. I am on a good deed buzz.
Just got to give up the caffeine now, or that and all this excitement will have me doing an impression of a road drill...........
Got lots of lovely work for an equally nice lady. Of course its needed ASAP with no specific time limits set, so naturally school has had a teacher training day, one of my kids has been off sick last week and this and I am full of another streaming cold and am typing this with one eye closed, at arms length - wont say why arms length, use your imagination. Everything that could go wrong has done just that, I feel backlogged with work and guilty as heck and you know what? I still just cant stop smiling.
My Birthday, on Monday, was brilliant - the kids got me cashews and Belgian chocs and were so excited and pleased with themselves that I felt all loved and snuggly. Then The Beloved Other Half BOH took the day off work (therefore so did I, naturally) and we sloped around town, starting at the best coffee house ever and ending up in an out of the way pub for a huge plate of steak and chips before coming home in time to get the kids from school.
I joined Telecom Plus / The Utility Warehouse, not just as a customer (oooh yummy, LOADS less in bills) but as a distributor as well. I mean, why not? I HATE selling stuff to people but everyone has a phone and an electricity supply and most have gas, internet and a mobile as well, so this is like falling off a log, its just getting them what they already shell out for but CHEAP. Established, longstanding, quality, proper and cheap. Not a cowboy in sight and after some hard knocks and silly mistakes, believe me when I say I know how to spot one - these guys however are proper, respectable, on the level and I am happy as a pig in mud.
Happy happy happy happy happy - its like getting a magic wand so I can play fairy Godmother and whiz round making my friends better off without them having to do anything but sign a bit of paper. I am on a good deed buzz.
Just got to give up the caffeine now, or that and all this excitement will have me doing an impression of a road drill...........
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